EMBODYING THE DIVINE MASCULINE
CONTEXT
Yesterday, a close friend connected with me on Messenger to pose a powerful question. It was a question unlike any that I had met before this point. Immediately, I could sense the fertile possibility of that moment, so I met the question fully: with the weight of my experience + sincerity of heart.
The following is an excerpt of our talk. May it open possibility inside your own important soul, unfolding story. May it remind you of the depths you always occupy - the bottomless potential of your life.
EXCERPT
HER: I want to play podcast host, and you be my special guest. I want to ask you about the Divine masculine. I've never met any man who I felt embodied Divine masculinity, so I haven't seen how it shows up in real life. What does it look like? How does it show up for you? What's your relationship with the term ‘Divine masculine’?
ME: These are such cool questions! The truth is that I have probably never witnessed the Divine Masculine. Additionally, I have never had any personal connection to the term. In fact, I have been facing in the complete opposite direction for quite some time.
Since very early on, I’ve turned my gaze to an admittedly more mysterious horizon: I’ve sought to know + to embody what is Soft, that bottomless expanse that we call Feminine. Because of this, my way has been a staircase of continuous surrender to the depths - a blind descent. Along the way, I’ve sought to constantly release the rougher edges of my nature to those purifying mercies of the Feminine Divine.
Holding this intention, I have willfully prioritized + cultivated those expressions which are Feminine in nature: I have done this in opposition to what is ‘natural’ or expected from a societal point of view. I have swum against the tide in that regard - in personal pursuit of what is True. This pursuit has been an ongoing developmental process of more than a decade now.
In that time, I have explored the Feminine Principle in all of its expressions: I have proactively engaged it in every way that I could think to. I have turned my focus inward + deliberately surrendered to the depths. I have drawn my daily sustenance from the generous Feminine Well.
It has not been an easy practice or pursuit. I spent much of my early twenties being called 'gay,' and really wondered if I was. It never stopped me. I knew that I was onto something true.
ME: Ironically, this unusual concentration on the Feminine has achieved an unexpected balancing of expression: it was everything most-needed to refine the rougher Masculine in me. I honestly believe that I have more or less 'accidentally' lived-into an embodiment of the ‘Divine Masculine’ by simple virtue of having balanced the polarities in me. And, of course, the process I’ve described here never ends.
The major difference for me now is that this journey treads a path in two directions: sinking roots into the earth of what is Feminine (soft surrender + its trust) while simultaneously stretching upwards toward the sky (that Masculine expression + its fruit).
Does this answer your question...?
HER: Wow, I'm reading and rereading. Did you delve into the feminine side consciously? Or as a rebellion against? Or neither?
ME: Consciously.
HER: With what aim?
ME: I never connected with the idea of 'being a big man.' Recognizing that, I felt an immediate intuitive awareness of its brightest possible alternative. Sensing this was like being taken gently by the hand: I felt drawn in, I felt its quiet promise like a tugging in my chest. It was as if I had been beckoned by a benevolent black hole. Kind of. It's hard to describe in words. Somehow I just knew. And somehow I just knew that I could trust it.
It was like I looked one way + everything inside of me said, "Yuck, not that way." And then I looked another way + everything inside of me said, "GO."
I followed that GO as if my life depended upon it, and I haven't ever stopped.